She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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