I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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