I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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