So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
