God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
