I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
