It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize