Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
