He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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