Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?

(1-312): View more from Illinois

not while she was awake

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(336): View more from North Carolina

There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel

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(970): View more from Colorado

I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big

(720): View more from Colorado

Welcome to my life

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.

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(330): View more from Ohio

It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.

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(425): View more from Washington

I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later

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(519): View more from Ontario

Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?

(1-519): View more from Ontario

Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?

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(360): View more from Washington

And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.

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(574): View more from Indiana

dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand

(1-574): View more from Indiana

There is no way that actually happened!

(574): View more from Indiana

the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.

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