Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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