Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
