cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
