oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
someone owes me an orgasm
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize