He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize
