My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
