I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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