so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
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