all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
