party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize