I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I am mentally ready for anal.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
