I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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