So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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