The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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