How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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