I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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