Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
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I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
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Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me