fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Found your dick twin last night
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.