dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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