I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
