god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize