how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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