she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
