I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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