I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
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