sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
