I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.