I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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