Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
