Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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