He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
