My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Success! We fucked roommates!
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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