Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
