Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Tornado booty call.. dedication
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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