You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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