..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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