I hate all girls vehemently.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
