If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
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pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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