Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
