i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
