nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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