So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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