You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
